Maybe a Little Crazy

So I'll admit it...I'm going a little nuts at home. Our kids and work (housework included) have the both of us white knuckling the edge of our sanity, wondering if there will ever be an end to the chaos. Last night I went out for my daily run and went on my 1.5 mile route. On this particular route I have to pass a house that has an eight pound Jack Russell Terrier whom I've dubbed "the evil punk dog." Yesterday was a particularly hard day for me and about fifteen minutes after Scott got home HE was pushing me out the door to run and relieve some stress. So I jog pass by this house with Evil Punk Dog and I know what's coming. I have to prepare myself because there have been a few times when this little snot has scared me so hard that I nearly wet my pants. Not because he's so vicious or intimidating, but because I have my Mp3 player going on blast and the little shister darts out at me at a Jaguar's pace from behind whatever evil rock or bush he's lurking behind, yiping, snapping and coming within inches of his invisible fence boundaries. Freakin' goober dog. Grrrr! Right back atcha, you little punk!

I know it's not nice of me to think so ill of a cute little dog (he IS cute despite his nasty defensive ankle biting tendancies), but yesterday it took every last ounce of restraint (which wasn't much, trust me) I had not to jump across his invisible line and punt his hairy butt back to the porch with my size nine pink New Balance running shoe. And this is what I've been reduced as a stressed out stay at home mom of three...a crazy lady who was a hair's breath away from kicking a tiny neighborhood dog.

We Have Success!

Praise the Lord! Our Zachary is finally potty trained!

You'll remember that we have been at this whole training deal for a year. When he turned three I pulled out the little potty, the brand new "big boy" Lightening McQueen undies, the reward chart, the stickers, the books, the videos and we went at it. It started out as a sweet mommy trying to teach her little boy the ropes. Oh sweet, sweet mommy who lovingly overlooked the accidents, the refusals to sit on the potty and encouraged him that "he could get it next time." Uh yea, she gave way to witchy, evil, speak through her clenched teeth mommy who threatened him within an inch of his life if he didn't "sit! down! on! that! POTTY! and POOP!"

Oh my heavens, friends, if me NOW could talk to me THEN I'd tell her to just cool it and wait.

Then just a few days before his 4th birthday (note: a whole year later) I caught him upstairs in his room trying to poo in his pants and whisked him straight to the potty. I was trying to cram his stiffened up, screaming body down onto the potty just in hopes of him dropping it in accidentally. Nope, he held it. I didn't care though. I made him sit and sit and sit, crying his eyes out the whole time. I sat crumpled at his feet begging him, threatening him, bribing him and finally, I just laid my head on the side of the tub and prayed out loud. "Lord! Please! Please just help Zach do this. Help him not be scared and to go potty. Please." And, sweet as pie, my little man said "Mom?" I looked up at him defeated and he says to me, "Mom, Jesus said I can get off the potty now." Touche, dude.

So I let him down, refuse to put undies back on him and made him sit on the potty every fifteen minutes as we had been doing for a week or so before. And FINALLY...he did it. I sent him in alone and a few minutes later he sheepishly opened the door and said "I did it." Hee hee!

And God as my witness, this kid has been doing it on his own ever since, every day, sometimes a few times a day. Are you kidding me!? Yay! He just had to decide on his own that he was going to do it and when he did...that's all she wrote. It's like a huge anvil has been lifted off of us. No more poopy pants and he is SO proud of himself. Now I get the extreme privilege of seeing his huge smile every day when he proudly declares he "did it!"

Way to go, Zach! It's just one more thing that proves YOU ARE THE MAN!

A Couple Random Thoughts

1. I love, love, love fresh pineapple. Oh yum-o. I've actually never had it until now b/c I'm not a huge fan of pineapple anyway. I always picked around it in the fruit cocktail. Then a friend at work gave me a slice of hers to taste and wow... we now have it cut and ready each week. I'm making pineapple smoothies with coconut milk for Abby and I. Yum. If you have an Aldi store near by you they carry REALLY sweet pineapples for $1.99.

2. This morning's sunshine is confusing me. It's too bright, too early and it keeps making me feel like I'm behind. We've had grey skies and rain for well, a week or better (seems like a month!) and this bright, sunshiney sunshine is most welcome but oh so strange. It's frickin' freezing outside, but as I look outside I can see plumes of steam dancing upward off of each fence picket and piece of deck furniture. It looks like the wetness is praising God, if you ask me. :)

3. Speaking of God. He shows up at the greatest times. As I'm slurping down my chocolate martini #2 last night I get a ping from a facebook friend and we begin to chat. I'm facebooking, having much needed stress relieving cocktails, listening/watching American Idol and having such a sweet chat with my friend who is telling me all about her praiseworthy experience of losing her first child. She amazed me. I appreciated and soaked in the spiritual maturity of her ability to praise God in the face of such a loss. For her to be able to see and touch her son's copper red hair, his still, porcelain face, feel the amazement that he is and give him and it ALL to God in the same space of time. Wow. Her story touched me so b/c it reminded me that fear, anxiety, loss and pain are not winners. I watch today as my mom goes through misery and torture and wonder, "God, where are you? Why won't you bless her? Why won't you MOVE? She's soo sad and lonely and apart." My friend's story reminds me that He is always there, no matter it be during a celebration or a mourning or anything between...HE...IS...THERE. The heart is the issue. Where is the heart? Is it sucuumbing to the siren call of fear, anxiety, loss and pain or is it broken and open to God.

4. I ran three full miles yesterday! Although I did have to walk a few small portions of it...I'm still proud of myself for making it through. Mile four...here I come!

Abba

That You thought of me, I am humbled. Sin threatened my life like thief with a dagger, but You bore the slash and pain of that dagger, the weight of my sin, the separation that was to be mine.

I watch this video and I cry every time...the whole movie was agony because I knew as I watched that my sin deserved that and You did not. What a gift! What an absolutely beautiful gift that I am embarrassed to say I disregard so many days of my year. I am SO sorry, Father. Forgive me for letting earthly life take precedence over You. I thank you for washing away my sins with one simple prayer and accepting of a free gift. Thank you for taking my nails, my lashes of the whip, my kicks and punches, my crown of thorns and my death and separation from God. It seems so small to even say Thank You for it. Lord, may my life be an offering to You on a daily basis. Change me. Woo me. Call me strongly to be a sold out, all committed servant of the Most High.

I love you.

Runnin' Fool

So I've finished two solid weeks of consistent running. I've been running from 1.5 to 3 miles per day - taking Fridays off. It's actually stressing me out today knowing that it's an "off" day and I need to not run.

I feel awesome though! I am SO proud of myself and can see small results already. I'm not eating as lousy as I was before (can't run on junk fumes or a full stomach), my stomach muscles feel tighter to me and I swear I saw a ripple of muscle on my thigh the other day. Yay! But of course I jump on the scale today and I've freakin' gained a pound!!!! :eek: Uh, not what I wanted to see AT ALL. I know, I know...gaining muscle, speeding the metabolism...weight loss will come eventually...but on a "break" day I definitely did NOT want to see that higher number. I'm trying not to let it settle in my mind and fester.

Tomorrow is suppose to be nicer than today (it's grey and raining all day), so I'm focusing on my morning run and not on today. Tonight is Abby's birthday party at Chuck E Cheese...I will not over-eat and ruin my morning run. :D

Have a great weekend, friends!