Monday, December 27, 2010

A New Heartbeat For 2011


Wow, did this month fly by or what? In fact, the whole year flew by for me. It's hard to even remember what all happened in 2010, but it's dawned on me that 2011 is almost here and I want to get some new goals down for myself. I did this in 2009 and by the end of this year 2010 I believe I've met pretty much all of them, so it's time to make a new list. I don't like the idea of "resolutions" because I'm the epitome of "I'm gonna do it", get half way there and either forget about it, give up or intend to finish it later and never do. Resolutions just sounds like something I'd break and well, I'm already defeated just by the name. Seriously! It's took me two years to complete the 2009 list, right? Back when I typed up that list it was more of a self-centered thing, a list of things "I" wanted, but this year it feels different.

This year I have a deep sense that God wants me to focus in on my family and it's way overdue. I've known that these things that are tumbling around in my head needed more attention, but I've had SO MANY other things that I've committed myself to (projects, studies, groups, etc) that I would have had to make a hard choice to quit things in order to focus better. As God would have it, my life has seemed to funnel down into a slower more focused pace already at the end of 2010. Commitments are naturally coming to a slow or end due to the holidays/end of the year and we've made a change in our church home and deciding to homeschool, so it just feels right where it should be. It feels like God has paved the way before me and simultaneously given me the passion inside to focus in on the things that matter: Scott, Abby, Zach, Lilly and our family as a whole. He has put me in this place of authority as the mother and wife, and I am greatly blessed. All my talents and energies have been used in so many other areas of life and poured out to blessed and honor others, even sometimes to the point of neglecting my own home and myself. I believe that God is saying to me "2011 needs to be different. This new year rest in my grace (no more striving to do it on my own), give yourself to your family and to the purpose of guiding them in my ways and you will be blessed." I believe he is going to help me be less driven to make myself fulfilled and find my identity in "doing as much as I can and doing it all right." As I focus on him, resting in his grace, filling myself with his presence and the Word, he is going to funnel all of that into my family, our home, our finances and bless our socks off in the process. I believe that all that I have done and learned in 2010 has prepared me for doing this. I can't wait to see what he does!! It's like knowing a gift is coming in the mail and you just can't wait until it gets to your house. I fully trust Him and his goodness!

Lord, take this list of goals and shape them into what you know is best for me and my family. Guide me into the success, blessings, abundance you have for us. Teach me and my family to live according to your Word and to live in your abundance.


Okay, so here's what the list looks like in my head:

1) Be consistently in worship, but also replace foolishly spent time (on Facebook, shuffling through the internet, etc) with purifying, adoring and listening time with the Father daily. All of us who have done this KNOW it feels awesome and wonder why in the world we don't do it more, so...I want to do it more. :)

2) Minimalize unnecessary things in the house and be more effective with the storage and placement of the things we have.

3) Be a wise steward of our finances and grow our savings. My hubby works very hard for the money he earns for our family and while we enjoy what we are given, we could be a LOT more wise with it. I don't want to mindlessly spend at the grocery or continue giving our money away to the fast food chains/coffee shops. I want to use what we have here at the house, buy used and save the difference, use recipes and cook at home and stop eating out so much. We also have a vision of moving out of this house and into a new home with land. In order to do that comfortably we need to be better stewards of our money.

4) I desire to be a happy cook. I want to cook healthier dishes with whole foods and stop giving us so much bagged/boxed/frozen/precooked stuff. Honestly when I think about dinner it just makes panic rise up inside. I'm not sure which part of the whole production makes me anxious, but it does and I don't want to feel that way anymore. I want to plan and prepare foods that are easy, tasty and good for us. God, you know this seems insurmountable to me, so I'm gonna stop thinking it over and just get under your faucet of grace and allow it to flow. Teach me to be a great cook for my family.

5) I want to homeschool my kids and teach them wisely all that they will need this year to be kind-hearted, biblically sound, intelligent and cooperative children. I know Rome wasn't built in a day and I don't expect that my already good kids are going to be uber-wise mini adults by the end of 2011. I just want to do my part in wisely teaching my children in the way that they should go according to the Bible and also to create an atmosphere in our home where they are loved and love each other well. Along with that I am reading now Managers of Their Chores so that I can also get into place a method of teaching them to be responsible for themselves and their family.

6) I really want to share my husband's heart and help him fulfill his desires for our family. The Lord has given me insights these past six months or so into Scott's heart and I see what he wants for his family and our future, but I also see how it grieves him that we are not on a path to make it a reality. I believe the above goals God has given me passion for are in direct relation to this specific goal. I am a Proverbs 31 woman in the making and as He directs me this year in achieving these goals it will strengthen my husband, release him from any fear he may have of the future and his family will truly be the jewels in his crown. THAT is a great goal to have as a wife!

I think those are a worthy beginning. They are basically things that I've known for awhile but allowed to be put on the back burner. They were notions of who I wanted to be BUT "I have aaaaall these other things to deal with." In 2011 I want to stop pushing these important things to the back and bring them to the front to be dealt with. It's exciting really! Lord, lead me!

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