Day 5

The past few days have been... interesting. As far as the fast part goes, I did eat a banana before I played tennis on Tuesday and then an hour into the match I had to drink a protein drink because I was so lightheaded, but the more interesting part was the spiritual side of this thing. I said yesterday that I'm focusing my prayers in on a few situations and one of those "sitches" is boiling over a bit. We'll call this person Person A. Person A opens up to me and reveals just what's going on inside of their head and heart by telling me to listen to all the songs on Eminem's Recovery track list. So I began my research on Youtube and well about half way into the list I was already being painted a very ugly, depressed and suicidal picture. I actually had to turn the music off because the lyrics were so vile and crude that my kids couldn't possibly be around. After a few texts Person A finally called me and started laying it on me. It's alllll my fault. Man, you should of heard it! If I were to buy into it all I'D be the one depressed and suicidal. Who knew I had all that power and control all along and didn't know it!? And the thing is I love Person A. If I looked at all the facts laid before me I'd be 110% sure that there is nothing to be done. Apparently I'm wrong, been wrong all along and there seems to be no help. Good thing I don't look at the facts. I mean, in the moment I often do, and there's where I get into trouble, flip out, don't react correctly, say things I shouldn't, etc, but God's Grace is sufficient for those times. When I take a step back, crawl into my prayer closet, God reveals the truth to me. I know that Person A isn't the one speaking and blaming me. I know I'm not the one at fault. I know that God is at work under the soil, in the unseen places. Sure, the topsoil looks dry, cracked, lifeless. But underneath that exterior lies the seeds of faith in Person A. I'm pouring fresh water on that through my prayers, through positive, affirm texts, through spiritual warfare and SO IS CHRIST (always up there beseeching the Father on our behalf.) I know that under the surface there is a miraculous work going on, a work of change and healing that is unseen but soon will burst forth in vibrant green color. A work that one day will sprout up into a strong healthy shoot and will glorify the one who caused the change. No, not me, but He who is working through me and He who spilled His blood for Person A. SO I will not be discouraged and I will press into this fast with all that I have in Christ, press forward to see that sprout of green come out of seemingly dead and dying soil.