The Helligator

I went to Polaris Fashion Mall today with my friend Karynda to let the kids play in the play area. We had to go downstairs to get there, but with a double stroller we had to take the elevator (a.k.a the helligator). Zachary was com-pletely freaked out and didn't want to be on it or go back in it to leave. Then the rest of the day I've had to hear "Mommy, no more helligator. Aaaalll gone helligator!" Bless his heart. To me it was just an elevator, but to Zach it was "THE HELLIGATOR!" *duh dun dun*

He PASSED!!!!!!!

*breathing a HUGE sigh of relief* and then *dancing the happy dance*

HE DID IT!!!

He's been checking the State Board website and all along it says his name with "Exam Pending" where his license number would soon be...but it's always said "Exam Pending." Well yesterday he came home early and walked with me to get Abby at school. He took Zach over to the park while Lil and I waited for Abby to come out. When I walked back to the park with the girls Scott simply handed me his phone. I looked and it said ACTIVE and an official State ID number beside it!!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!! He did it! We hugged and laughed and just kept smiling. I am soooooo proud of him. Fourteen years of schooling, working, studying, taking nine exams and building this career he has and FINALLY - it's all come to this happy day. He still won't relax though (go figure, right?) until he has either his paper exam results that say he passed or an official letter from the State, which I understand.

I don't think this will change daily work life for him too much, but it does mean that he can officially stamp and send out drawings, work out on his own (not that he would - we love KDG) and finally has the real title to go with all the hard work he does. AWESOME!! Of course, with the cool official stamp comes great and cool responsibility. So Scott...no frivolous stamping!

God bless him. I know he already feels such a load off, as do I. I'm proud to have been here all along (except that first year and he totally slacked off without me *wink*) to watch him grow, encourage him, pick up any slack around our house while he studied, check the mail and report, etc....and I'm proud to walk forward with him, my sweet-arse official Architect man. Hee hee.

License and Registration Information
Credential	License Type	Original Issue Date	Expiration Date	Status
ARC.0814654	Architect	05/27/2008	12/31/2009	ACTIVE

Congratulations, babe! You deserve it!

Memorial Weekend Update

Hi all! It's been a few days since I've posted and it's been crazy here. Let me see, where to begin?

Saturday was a pretty rough day as far as Mommy life went. Scott was at a tennis tournament all day and evening, so it was just the kids and I. It seemed that everything was jumping on my last nerve and Zach was being more of Zach than ever before. So I started the holiday by myself by opening a bottle of Pinot Grigio as soon as they went down to nap. I turned on a girlie movie "P.S. I Love You" and cried my eyes out. I couldn't tell if I was crying out of sheer frustration with my job or if it was the movie theme (her husband dies and he teaches her how to move on through a series of letters sent to her after his death.) Either way I was venting like Old Faithful! I was a slobbering, heaving puddle of a mom. I yelled that I was tired and frustrated and overwhelmed and didn't know what to do and needed help. I felt weak and humbled and like I REALLY wanted to run back to a job outside of the home. My mind raced with regret and dizziness (mostly from the wine) all the time knowing I'd need to clean my act up within nanoseconds because at any moment either of the three kids would need me.

So I called my mom and blubbered my feelings to her, and bless her soul...she understood. She said "oh honey, it's okay. You're gonna be okay. These are normal feelings of a mom and tomorrow you will feel better and differently." I swear, as soon as I got it all out...I really did feel better. My head started to clear and I realized that I was not hardly in control around here and that it is MY JOB to be the temperature control of the house. I have been getting so frustrated with the kids and their emotions and needs that I'm showing it in my actions toward them, and thusly getting them all frustrated and just setting a big Crazy Cycle. That evening when Scott got home I went out and sat on the garage floor (it was quiet and I could look outside without being noticed by too many people) and prayed, "God, PLEASE...I'm humbled and weak AND I NEED YOUR HELP! Guide me, show me which way to go b/c at this point I want to run away from this big job."

Sunday was much better. Scott woke up with a frenzy and cleaned the entire house (vacuumed everywhere, cleaned up the hot spots, did about five loads of laundry and put it all away, put the vegetable plants in the garden, etc.) He was amazing! He even came up with this ingenious way to hang up one of my unruly shirts that refused to stay on the hanger. This mega help around the house was just what I needed to jump start me back into my role.

I went to church with a friend and the message was tailored just for me. The Scripture in the first point made me cry: 1 Chronicles 28:20 (Whole Chapter) Then David continued, “Be strong and courageous, and do the work. Don’t be afraid or discouraged, for the Lord God, my God, is with you. He will not fail you or forsake you. He will see to it that all the work related to the Temple of the Lord is finished correctly. I am building temples here - three important holy temples and that's a huge undertaking. But God promises me that He will not fail or forsake me in this task; He will see to it that it is done right. Not in my own strength but in His. Phew! So my duty is to seek Him daily for my ration of strength and guidance. My friend Stacey also showed up on Monday with a CD called Finding Your Purpose as a Mom by Family Life Today. God just kept sayin' "I'm here and I hear you! Let me lead you, Daughter." Nice, huh!? Thanks, Big Daddy!

In other news - Zachary has become quite the escape artist. Just this weekend we've found him out front of our house without us THREE times. Once he was naked! The first time someone didn't quite get the front door shut tight (we have child locks on the doorknobs) and he went right on out to try and get in Gramma's car. The second time we came down from taking a bath and I went in the living room to dress Lilly. Suddenly I wondered where the other naked kid was and went looking. The little shister had ripped the screen open on the front window (it already had a small hole in it) and went right on out. I found him naked on the driveway trying to get in Daddy's car. Do you think he wants to drive or what? The third time he figured out how to unlatch the gate on the fence by sticking his hand through the slats. *sigh* SO I had to go buy two padlocks to put on the gates. It's only a matter of time before he realizes he can climb right over though. So the plan is to be mucho attentive to where he is at all times. Not that we weren't before, but we felt like with the safety locks on the doors and him being in the backyard - we had a safety net there. All bets are off now though and we're on mega watch and play. If all else fails - we have a big roll of duct tape! Boys!

I FOUND YOU!

Zachary thought it was hilariously funny to hide under a blanket, then pop out and scream "I FOUND YOU!" Here is the progression of our hilarity. Disclaimer: the third video contains unsolicited and sudden butt sniffing and Daddy was in complete control. We do NOT fling our children around by their arms - notice the simultaneous punt with the foot. :)~

Of Course

Yesterday (or was it the day before) I checked the weather forecast for this Memorial Weekend and was excited by what I saw. Three days of warmth and sunshine!! Oh the possibilities that lie ahead!! Of course I check again today and Memorial Day it's suppose to be the highest temperature it's been all year - 86! - and isolated thunderstorms. Go figure. It always rains on Memorial Day.

Still waiting for Scott's exam results. I actually get angry when I grab the mail and it's nothing but credit card applications and ads. I shout out, "Damn it, Creditors. Stop it! I DON'T WANT YOUR CARD and this is NOT a good time to send me two thick envelopes that look official!" Poor Scott too. He's not a very good patient person. He's tried, but we're starting the third week of waiting and the thought of waiting through TWO days without mail delivery looms over like a heavy Memorial Day thunderhead. I hope it comes today or tomorrow, for his sake. Stinking State of Ohio board...they know the results and are not calling, emailing or posting results. Don't they understand the stress this puts a person under!? *drumming my fingers on the counter*

Off to make myself presentable for the day! We have a slumber party here tonight and the excitement is building. Abby can hardly stand it! TWO friends get to stay over! They're gonna make their own pizzas and watch a movie, and any other goofy girlie thing they can think of...barbies, make-up, writing notes, Webkins, etc. It'll be fun!

I Love My Husband

Yep - I do! I love this man so much that it aches.

I am very blessed to know that I married a man who is of such great character, an extremely dedicated father, has passion for whatever he puts his mind to, is more handsome than he'll ever believe, devilishly funny (what attracted him to me) and best of all...he chose me. And now, almost thirteen years of being together and nine years of being married, here we are still laughing and doing this thing called marriage and parenthood together. Is it crazy that I still long to "date" my husband? I don't think so. I crave this guy. I can't wait for him to get home each day, and not just to save me from the kids, but because I like being in his company. I think about the days ahead when our children are older and we have freedom to go have long dinners out, walks together, go to the movies, sit and cuddle on the couch without 30 pound and 50 pound WWF wrestlers jumping on us. Ahh...someday we'll get to go on a long vacation together alone and enjoy each others bodies in another land. Did I mention we did not have a honeymoon!? I'm thinking on our ten year anniversary we need to go somewhere fun! Don't you agree!?


Let's not be disillusioned. We still have our off times when we annoy each other, like every other married couple, but all in all - we are in love and awe of each other. I just gotta say that I cling to this marriage. I'm grateful for it, for who my husband is and consider the whole package a true gift from God. It's a holy thing, something to be revered, committed to and kept sacred. It's not worth jeopardizing over money, gambling, drinking, work, self-gratification, sex, other people's opinion, (insert other marriage killers here). Do you promise to love, comfort, honor and keep him for better or worse, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health. And forsaking all others, be faithful only to him so long as you both shall live?" I DO!

So - here's to you, Yo! *raising my coffee mug in appreciation* I love you! And I promise NEVER to wait five extra minutes before checking the mailbox for your exam results again. :)

May This Bless You Today

What a Savior! This God who lived as a man and willingly died for me, this brutal, unjust death...HE is why I breathe today.

What Season is This?

I'm sitting here after a long night up and down with Zachary (and getting up with Lilly at 5:30am *yawn*) wondering what it is I am going to do. Who can I call? Who could come visit or who could I bug to visit them? Hmm...no one. I honestly have NO close girlfriends to just call up and say "hey, I'm coming over. I'm lonely." Oh I know I have a few people that if I said that to them, they'd be willing to change their schedule to accomodate, but I don't want that kind of visit. I just miss having a girlfriend or two who are in the same life season as me (kids, husband, craziness) that are willing to sit and chat and let the kids play together for a few hours. All of my girlfriends are in different life stages right now. The gals I raised Abby with are now on to the next phase of soccer, baseball, dance recitals, working on getting their careers back up and running...and *said through clenched teeth* vacations for the Summer. I am stuck back in diapers, naps, interupted sleep, crying kids and being stuck at home. I feel like a recluse. Yea, I have the YMCA to go to and I can always take a walk to the park, etc...but I'm lonely here. I feel like the girl at the bar who is sitting and watching the purses at the table while all the other girls are out dancing and having fun. *sigh* I KNOW this is just a season of life and the kids will grow and get easier to be with/go out with. I also hear that I'll miss this stage of my kids being young and I don't want to wish away this time. I guess I just miss having someone to do this Mommy thing with (Aside from my hubby, of course. He's always great to commiserate with, but it's different. Ya know?). I miss having a girlfriend to call, to ask if they are going through the same thing, if I'm normal in feeling this overwhelmed and tired, to look forward with, to drink a beer with, to just BE with. Actually, I miss being able to talk on the phone period! Has anyone tried to talk to me on the phone lately...it's ridiculous. All the screaming and constant "Mommy. Mommy. Mommy!?!? MOMMY!!!!"

Are you feeling me out there? Do I sound totally pathetic? Yes you do, Christy. :)~ Nah, I'm not pathetic. I'm just being introspective.

I just miss the community of girlfriends I use to have. I miss feeling that sense of importance while working out there in the real world. I miss being able to go to the store by myself and feeling freedom. I have a sense that this is just a season of life and it will pass, and that I should take it for what it's worth and enjoy it as much as possible. I know sometimes life gets quiet and God takes you out of the game so that you can realign yourself with Him and those most important to you. I just don't feel like I can get realigned or get quiet when I'm needed by three children on a constant basis. My nerves and senses are bombarded by them all day and night. I feel like I'm holding it together with coffee, make-up and hope. Hmmm...that's definitely an appropriate subtitle to my life right now. :) I know there are other Moms of multiple kids out there who are feeling the same way. *knocking on my computer screen* You out there, Internet Mommies? Anyone? Hello?

Well, my batteries on the laptop are low. Must go plug in and recharge. Better go do the same thing for my spirit. Where're my coffee and Bible?

Have a great day to anyone reading this!

YOU HATE ME!

Did I miss a birthday gift to Abby this year? Did someone sneak in a copy of "The Most Commonly Used, Emotionally Charged Things to Scream at Your Mother" amongst all the other gifts, and I totally missed it? When did life become SOOOO horrible for my seven year old that she has to jump to the screaming conclusion that I "hate her and she's stupid?" It honestly hurts me to hear her say that and I wonder what in the world is in her head. Is she testing me? Does she want me to run after her with a tissue and say "No honey, I don't hate you!"? Am I doing the right thing by letting her run away screaming things at me? Honestly - where the heck is that parenting handbook!? Oh yea...there isn't one! Frick! The worst part is that she's the first child so it's all trial and error on her head...the guinea pig of the family. I feel badly for her but at the same time I HAVE to have a stronger will than her and that sucks! I wanna go back to college...it was MUCH easier back there.

The Stroller Dilemna

Way to go, Christy! *smack myself in the forehead* I decided that I wanted a double jogging stroller instead of the Sit-n-Stand double stroller I had (which was quite nice.) So I go trolling on Craigslist and find what I think is the one I want. I go through about ten emails and a few phone calls trying to organize getting together with this seller and in the meantime I sell my own stroller in order to pay for this one. I finally reach her today and get over to her house only to find that the damn thing won't fit in my trunk. DARN IT! Are you kidding me? Why wouldn't I ask the dimensions before 1) selling my own and 2) going through all this trouble!? So now I'm strollerless with two small kids. Actually, I have two umbrella strollers, so in a pinch I could use one of those and make Zach walk but I'd really rather shove bamboo up my fingernails than venture out without him being strapped down. It ALWAYS turns into a struggle and ends with me sweating through the armpits of my shirt and cursing the day he was born. And I know what you're thinking... "you should just MAKE him walk" or "he needs to be disciplined enough to walk with you" or "he'll learn if you just give him some freedom" but believe me, I've tried it all (bribes, time outs, leashes, threats, spanking, pinching the flesh on his shoulder, respectfully asking, holding his hand firm.) Plus we all have to remember I have an eight month old I have to carry or push as well, so if he dashes off I have to either run to keep up, baby flopping and weighing me down, or leave her behind. It's easier on us all if he just gets into a stroller and knows he's in there for the long haul. He has no qualms about being in the stroller either - I think it works for him too. He's not mature enough to know the dangers of not sticking with Mom/Dad. Abby was not like that - she was always a more cautious child. I know, I know...no comparing. That's not fair to either child. So I need to find an alternative situation and soon! This keeps us from going to the park, walks around the neighborhood, malls, major outings. I CAN'T believe I painted myself into this corner. What a goof!

The Blogging Revolution...why not me!?

I just started blogging a month ago and I really do love it. Finding the time in between splitting up fighting kids, stirring Mac-n-Cheese, changing diapers and folding laundry to blog is kinda like sneaking a nip of vodka would be for an alcoholic. *sneakily looking around* HOW can I sneak it in without anyone noticing? And when I finally do, it's like...ahhhh...I DID IT! Take that, you crazy life of mine! I linked to Dooce and have been checking out her blog daily. This chic is hard-core blogging...making money, getting notoriety via news and such and enjoying the success of being a "Mommy Blogger." (not to mention she's totally cute and hip looking) So why not me? Why couldn't I be a successful blogger, gaining daily readers and financial security. I checked out her website and the other three Mommies on the Today Show, and I really think I'm JUST as interesting as they are...maybe more. ;) I'm not a writer by trade like the one gal and I don't use profanity as readily as they do (although I surely am more liberal when being verbal), but my life is just as interesting. SO why not? Well, I say I CAN. I just have to figure out how to get more traffic out there to come in here. Hmmm?? *scratching my head* I guess in the meantime I get to wow my closest friends and family with the stories, pictures and video of my life. :) Hi-ho! Hi-ho! It's off to blog I go. (whistles) Hi ho, hi ho, hi ho, hi ho.

The New 'Do

I finally did it! My hair was SOOOOO long after giving birth to Lilly and I just loved it. Then once she was here it was falling out like crazy and got really dried out. The stylist suggested I cut three inches off and it made a whole world of difference in the way it looked. I've just been pulling it up in a ponytail holder for SO long too that I kept thinking to myself, "just cut it, Christy. You look good with short-short hair too and it'll grow back." I went to get it cut short six weeks ago and totally chickened out but this time I was serious. No nerves at all, just ready to do it. Plus, I am always on the tail end of the trends. No matter what it is I just watch it go by wishing I had the money or the nerves to go with it and then when I either get the money, the nerves or the trend is out and no one else wants it (hence it's cheap enough) then I get it. SO, I did it. I cut my hair in the short bob that I see on everyone else and totally love. Surprisingly, I love it. We'll see how it goes in the next week and how easy it is to manage but right now I think it's cute. *big cheesy grin* The photo I took myself so that I could send it to Abby at Gramma's house. Those "at the end of the arm" shots are always SO lovely, but this one wasn't too awful to share. You get the gist of how short it is anyway. :)

I win this one

Scott has always said I was crazy for eating breakfast for dinner. I love cereal for dinner and/or the full work up of eggs and pancakes. There's no better comfort food in my mind than a big stack of buttery, syrupy cakes and over easy eggs with buttered wheat toast. Then you need a big cup of coffee to wash it down. *slurp* Sounds like dinner to me! Scott just can't fathom it and when I brought it up as an option the other week he said "no way" and that I was nuts. I told HIM that LOTS of people eat breakfast for dinner and he's the nutty one. :) He disagreed, so I said I'd poll people. Thanks to the five of you who voted. Geesh - I need more traffic on here. *wink* Anyway, Scott posted on his website too and the results were a resounding "YES, breakfast for dinner!" So score one for Christy! Mwa-ha-ha-ha-ha! Now if I can just prove that he really does take up more of the bed in the middle of the night.

Thursday

Well, nothing all too interesting going on here at the moment. We're still waiting for Scott's test results and are on countdown to the last day of school. Abby has 15 school days left! Hard to believe and that'll go slower than it sounds. Do you remember that? Just how slooooow those last days of school drug by. I do. Then you waited for the mail to come (just like Scott *wink*) to get the grade card that had a check that said "Pass to the next grade" or "Remain in current grade." I was that kid that just flew under the radar, just did enough to keep the adults off of my back and pass. So sad to think about really b/c I had great potential to do better. Anyway, now we have TWO things to anticipate in the coming days. :) Oh, and I thought it was too funny this morning and knew I could share here. Abby got up two days in a row, dressed herself in pretty clothes and came downstairs without being asked. Shocking, I know! So today she had on a leopard print skirt and a black top completed with gym tennis shoes and green striped socks. LOL! It's like she has two sides to her. She desperately wants to be fashionable and wear what she loves (a.k.a strappy, sparkley sandals), but then there is her sensible, sensory side that tells her she has gym today and must wear tennis shoes and socks. So she compromises and does both. Actually, now that I think of it, I'm gonna attach a picture of her I took last week when she came down wearing a different concoction and made me laugh. She even struck a pose like she was something hot. LOL I love that girl! ANY-WAY...she jumps out of the van and meets Isabela at the curb. This next action HAS to be totally inbred in females b/c I swear it was like watching nature happen. They come hip to hip and as they are walking to the big grey doors Abby takes an inventory scan of Isabela from head straight to her shoes and back up...AND as if on cue, Isabela did the EXACT SAME THING to Abby. If I had blinked I would have missed it...it was so quick. But you could almost see their little gears turning inside, comparing themselves, taking note of what the other had on, judging the outfits. It was hilarious to me and I really did laugh out loud.

What else? Don't forget next week is the American Idol finale! Tuesday at 8pm (EST). Which David will it be!? I'm completely torn. I like both a lot now. They both have a career no matter what and if I'm thinking in the "this is NOT a popularity contest" vein...I'd vote for David Cook. He really is the entire package deal! I'd buy his CD right now, I think. David A is totally adorable and has an A-MAZING voice. Possible downfalls: he's still quite young and could benefit from more life experience and professional grooming. He's also kinda pigeon holed into that ballad genre. I could totally see him on Broadway. And SPEAKING OF THAT...Fantasia freaked me out last night. Scott and I couldn't believe our eyes. She came across as this crazy Amazon woman and (even though I'm sure that's the way the song was meant) she was singing SO hard and fast that I couldn't understand her half the time. Phew - and that hair. God love her. I forgive her though b/c she's on Broadway with The Color Purple, which is one of my all time favorite movies. I'd actually love to see that show. Hell, I'd like to see ANYTHING on Broadway! Someday.

One more thing...the new ticker. That is simply a daily reminder for me. I have a goal of paying down the van, this year if possible. So each time I make a payment I simply enter in the amount and it shows me moving down the debt. It's a good thing...I need daily motivation. I'm also planning to go cash/debit again. Whenever I do that, it forces me to pay attention to what I'm spending b/c it comes directly from checking. Our credit card bill seems to keep staying up too high and even though we pay it off every month, it's waaaay too much. Our pastor just mentioned this as a biblical way of managing your finances too. Romans 13:8 Let no debt remain outstanding except the debt of loving one another. Plus, with gas and food prices going up, it's best to cut costs and spending now and focus on the goal of paying off the van. Scott's car is paid for and we hope it'll last at least until we get the van taken care of. One car payment at a time, please! Last year we took a lot of dings as far as major expenses go and so we took a LOT out of savings, to the point of near depletion. My goal this year is to only put money IN. We have enough in there for any emergencies, but if we live more simply and contentedly then we'll be able to put more money away, esp for the kids' college funds. So - that's what's up with the ticker. Hee hee...short story, long.

Have a great one!

"He's just three"

*sigh* Someone needs to remind me of this daily b/c I could just SCREEEEAAAAAMM!! He's been awake for about fifteen minutes and I've already had to swat his toosh once for deliberately disobeying me (walking on the back of the couch.) Not only that, I have to hear "whas dat!?" and repeated commands two THOUSAND times a day. You can tell him exactly what something is, and it's something he's seen before like say a diaper, but he has to ask you at least five times in succession. And he can't just ask for Kipper once, it has to be ten times. Grrr! I know, I know...he's figuring things out, Christy. Just give the kid a break. I just get so exhausted by it all day long. Like right, for instance, he's sitting right beside Lilly wrapped in a blanket (he is) and he's trying to wrap her up with him. Cute, right!? WRONG! This quickly escalates to him rolling right on top of her, laying with all his weight on her and watching her struggle and scream. And we've told him no on this at least a hundred times. Last night he picked Lilly up and then dropped her just as I was rounding the corner to the living room. GAH!!! I know he's just three years old, but he's driving me NUTS! And then in an hour he'll be the cute, sweet little guy again. All of this is normal according to the book "Your Three Year Old" but I'm ready, waaay ready, for him to be older.

Back to Reality

All three children are awake, tho one is totally playing the beast who's been awakened from a nap. I can just imagine what she'll be like as a teenager! :) It's back to reality from a really great day yesterday.

This weekend turned out to be a lot less regimented than initially expected. Scott strained his chest pretty badly and ended up running to the Urgent Care Saturday morning, which kept him homebound all weekend. They basically just gave him a muscle relaxer and sent him on his way. Nevermind the poor guy couldn't breathe right or move his arms in a full motion. Where's the pain meds, people!? Three days later and he's feeling a lot better. Well, better than Saturday morning anyway. Those darn strains seem to take FOR-EVER to repair. So he got to work from home and had to get a sub for tennis, so we had him all weekend!

Mother's Day was VERY nice for me! Scott watched the kids all day while I got to go to the G&J Show with my mom and Adam (yes, he had a great time too) and then out to lunch. The Show turned out to be really fun. We always have a great time together, the three of us. We're usually laughing about something or other and reminiscing about the past. Btw, Adam does a HILARIOUS imitation of the Indian guy who presumably works at the 7-11 and runs the slurpee machine! As my mother's day gift I got to pick out something pretty for myself there at the show. I ended up getting a bangle watch (leopard print!) and a really pretty square cut ring. PLUS there was hardly anyone there at the show when we got there, so NO SHOVING necessary. It made the whole experience a lot easier and more enjoyable. Then I got home just in time to meet with Scott's side of our family. That's always fun too. Now that we have all three kids, it's just easier on everyone if we meet here at our house and let the kids do their thing. Zach gets pretty wild when we get in a crowded get together and in a new environment, so it's best to minimize where he can go and stay with what he knows. We had Subway for dinner then Alicia made a really refreshing Angel Food Cake with crushed pineapple/pudding/whip cream topping. It was really good, especially for a Summer get-together. I highly recommend it! Then I made a pot of coffee and we sat around a chewed the fat, watched the kids play and just enjoyed the day. It was nice! It made me painfully aware though that we are tight for space when we all get together. Our table has a leaf, but we don't have enough chairs and when we put the leaf in we have even less room to walk around. So the guys had to stand up to eat and when we were in the living room a few of us had to sit on the floor. In the grand scheme of things it's no big deal and on the majority it's just the five of us, so for NOW it works. I think as these kids grow though - it'll be tight having two adults and three grown children buzzing or sitting around in here.

All in all, I had a great mother's day and I hope that we made my own mother and Scott's mother feel loved as we spent time together. As Kate said on 'Jon and Kate Plus Eight' - I think Mother's day should be once a month! :)

On a sadder note...I do feel so bad for those Mormon mothers (sexual scandal aside) that have to be without their babies today. I don't think that Mormons actually celebrate "Mother's Day" per say, but as I enjoyed my own kids last night I thought of all those mothers whose many children are separated from their families and siblings and have not seen their mothers for weeks. It's tragedy in play. I mean...I have three small children who depend on me day and night, one little nursling at my breast and I couldn't go a few hours without thinking of them every twenty minutes. I can hardly bear the thought of being forced away from them for even one night let alone weeks, not knowing when I'd get to be with them, worrying if they are scared or being cared for how I would do it. *grasping my chest* It's SO sad for those babies and their parents.

Well...it's taken me two hours to compose this blog entry due to the usual hubbub around here. I'd better "get 'er done!" around here. :)

Have a great Monday! It's mucho laundry and some pants hemming for me today.

Lilly's Crawling

Just in case you missed the video bar waaaaay at the bottom...I got some footage of Lilly crawling. I can hardly believe it! But even more than THAT - yesterday she said "Ma" AND pulled herself to a standing position on the couch. *jaw dropping* WHAT!? Woohoo...she's growing up!!

Plans for Mother's Day Weekend

I feel like this weekend is mapped out to the hour. Scott's workload increased again, which I knew was coming but is never a completely happy thing for me. So instead of him studying in the extra minutes, he'll be working. Don't get me wrong, love the job, love that he in totally committed, but with three kids when he's off work I need him home. But this weekend is stocked full of things to do and Saturday morning has been committed to KDG. He'll try to get in at 6am and work probably until his tennis plans at Noon. Then he'll come home, shower and be ours for the rest of the day. Abby and I are pleased to be invited to our friend Isabela's First Communion this weekend. I appreciate the invitation b/c I feel like they feel we're part of the family circle. Isabela really is like a sister to Abby. They're together nearly every day, along with Isa's sister Franchesca. They've been that way for several years now. It helps they are two houses down from us. :) So - we're very glad to go see and support this HUGE event in her religious life.

Sunday morning will be church at the 9am service (no leaving early, right P. Steve!? *wink*) and then meet my mom at The Gem and Jewelry Show at 11am-ish. She LOVES going to this show. It's a huge coliseum of vendors from around the world selling their niche of jewelry, beads, loose gemstones, rare and generic rocks, bricka-brack, fur coats, leather purses and perfume. I can usually get through the hundreds of vendors within an hour, but my mom and brothers like to really stop and look and each place. And bless my soul if they find a vendor they like! If it weren't SO awful crowded and the people SO rude in there, I might be able to handle it better, but within minutes of being there I've usually been pushed out of the way, rudely been talked to and/or snubbed. So, I tend to peruse and then commit to a location and wait. Note to self: bring bottled water b/c anything consumable in this place will cost you your firstborn child. I do kinda hope to find something beautiful, shiny and reasonably priced while I'm there. I am a glitter girl, so if it sparkles I'm attracted. I just hate being shoved out of the way while I'm gazing. Ya know? After the G&J Show we'll go on over to The Spaghetti Warehouse for late lunch/early dinner. We kinda love this place. It's an old warehouse downtown that's converted into a rustic restaurant. Their food is nothing to scream about but the ambiance of the place is what keeps you coming back. You can even eat in an old train car, if there is seating available. Then my other side of the family (Hi Mom and Alicia) will be coming over for dinner-dinner. I'll have to just have a drink and appetizer at the Warehouse so I don't spoil my dinner.

I also assume I'll be kissed and hugged a lot by a cute seven year old girl and thirty-two year old hubby, and told I'm the best Mother in the world. The best part will be the homemade gift/card that Abby has been secretly creating in school. She's very excited about it and it's every mother's heart joy to dramatically fawn over marker, macaroni and tissue paper laden projects that you know your baby made with her own fingers and love. I imagine it'll be given to me today after school b/c just like her own mother, she cannot keep a secret to save her life. I;ll tell her to hold onto it for me til Sunday and she'll burst and say "Nooooo way, Mom. You have to have it NOW!" I love it!

Happy Mother's Day to all the Moms! Thanks for doing all that you did, are doing and will do in the future! I'm blessed to have a great relationship with my own mother now and a mother-in-law that I love very much and gives me no cause to say "mother-in-law" with a bad taste in my mouth. THAT is something to sing about this weekend!

Early Start

As you could see by my Twitter to the right there, Zachary had no nap yesterday. Btw, the Twitter just lets me give everyone tidbits of how my day is going or what I'm experiencing btwn posts. Kinda fun little feature! :) Not that ANYONE is all that interested in MY life minute by minute. I digress. Zachary had no nap yesterday, so I put him to bed at 7:30 last night. He cried for about twenty seconds and then was heard from no more. Until 3:45 am that is! That little turkey woke up and would NOT go back to sleep. I went in once, then made Scott get up and tell him to go back to sleep. Then we were woken up again within minutes of him rolling his cars across our adjoining wall. That wall is ridiculous too. It sounds like someone's banging a gong in our room when Zach hits or kicks it. So you can imagine with little Matchbox cars having an Indy 500 it sounded like the real deal in our room. So I got up and we went down to the couch with him. I got a few more twenty minute naps during the On Demand cartoons, but he's still going strong this morning. I foresee a meltdown of major proportions, but it's unclear if it'll be me or him. :)~ Lilly also got up to nurse once before Zachary, so my sleep last night was all messed up. Lord, please remind me to be patient and speak kindly to my son/daughters today.

I had thought I'd go workout this morning, but Max has a recheck visit. OH - I didn't update everyone on this via the blog. Yea, Max apparently has no Lymphoma OR pneumonia. Yup - $300 later and a full weekend of worrying - the specialist was "unimpressed with the x-rays" and could see nothing remarkable on them. Really!? How does a veterinarian misdiagnose pneumonia that badly and get a patient all worked up over the possibility of losing their pet (b/c we wouldn't treat Cancer)??? It's really concerning to me that they were all "this pneumonia is really bad and we're gonna pump him full of a serious antibiotic and send you home with meds and send his x-rays out for Cancer check" and then it's neither cancer nor pneumonia. He clearly has something, some sort of infection b/c he responded to the meds and is much better. Although, the past few days I've noticed him coughing really hard again. His breathing is 90% better though. so - I guess I'll take him in today and see what they think again. Financially speaking, I really don't want to have to run through a whole battery of tests to find out what IS going on, but at the same time I don't want him to get that sick again in a month. I wonder if a simple blood test could check for different things.

Crud! Well, I've been out of bed since 5:00am and I'm still standing here in my jammies and now Lilly is crying to get up. Time to start the day.

Our lame attempt at a picture

Abby has to bring in a picture of her with her Mommy. So, in the usual fashion, we're scrambling to do it at the last minute. And I'd just like to say, there is nothing quite like taking a picture of yourself at arms length to make you rethink cosmetic work. Enjoy the laugh! And yes, Abby was shirtless and we realized it was inappropriate for school projects. :) Thankfully Daddy conveniently left his Tshirt on the kitchen floor!

Workout

I FINALLY got back to the YMCA today and got a workout in. Exercise Fusion they call it! It's a combination of aerobic workout and strength training with weights, body bar and a step. It feels pretty intense! After being out so long today just drug by. I looked up at the clock hoping I had like fifteen minutes left in the hour, but it'd been only half an hour. I sweat my toosh off! It's good. Then I checked my weight..blah. Friggin' scale! I'd gained a few pounds back. Can't blame the scale as much as the pizza and milkshakes...or maybe myself? I'm not all worried about it or anything, not gonna run over and throw up my lunch or beat myself. But I do need to kick it up a couple notches if I want to lose the rest of the weight I want to by my second goal date, which is July 17th. That's seven pounds in nine and half weeks. I can do that! Oooh...but those chocolate chip milkshakes we eat are SOOOO good. It's a sin.

I also realized when I got there, facing the whole wall of unholy mirrors, that I looked like death warmed over. What is it with those mirrors anyway? I swear I look like the hunchback of Notre Dame in them. So I hurry in there and pee on my spot on the floor (you have to mark your section in that class b/c it's SO full), run back to the bathroom and go pee for real, then race back just in time to start the class. I glance at myself and realize I hadn't washed my face at all before I left the house, my hair was falling completely out of the rubber band and my tennis shoes were green from mowing the grass. I felt like melting into the floor even while my arms and legs were obeying the tiny screaming woman in the front. Everyone else looked great in their workout gear too. *sticking my tongue out* Some women even have their make-up on to the T, hair perfectly placed and such. Ugh. Well, at least I got there, right!? And the point IS to workout and sweat, not look pretty. So I give it all I got and am thankful that I did it. I can get a shower and look decent later, I suppose. What's worse about this scenario is that I was up at 600am and had plenty of time to shower and get ready. I piddled my 40 minutes away this morning that i had to myself. Oh well, tomorrow is another day. I am thinking that I should be getting up at 6am each day anyway. If the kids are sleeping through the night, I should be getting up early to get myself clean and presentable, and also to get my daily devotions done. I always do SO much better in the day when I get a daily front end alignment with God.

Off to do something less exciting than typing about myself. :)

Don't Shake His Hand

One of the "joys" of potty training a boy is the constant screaming of "STOP TOUCHING YOUR WIENER!!" Honestly, it's become his favorite toy and past time. Nothing else to do? Grab the wiener. Oh, there's a Barney video box! I wonder where that should go? On my wiener! "Hey Mom, look what I can do!?" I look over to see him pulling it so far that I was pretty sure he was going to hurt himself. So, I'm pretty tired of asking him to stop touching himself.

This evening I talked him into a stroller walk and had to wrangle him down to get a diaper on. I run to corner him, sweep him up in my arms and fling him to the couch. I grab the diaper and within three seconds, he's got his hands on it already. GAH! I drop my arms to the sides and whine in a completely defeated tone, "Zachary, HOW many time do I have to ask you to STOP grabbing your wiener!?" He rolled his eyes upward for a split second, looked right back at me and said, "32 times." Pflt! I threw my head onto his tummy and laughed uncontrollably. Then he grabbed my head in his chubby hands, pulled my face to his and said, "I saw-wee, Mom." *heart melting in my chest* Are you kidding me? I could just eat his face, he's so stinking cute. It's moments like that that you want to freeze time and keep them small forever.

In the meantime, should you ever come across this dear, sweet, hilarious little boy - do NOT shake hands with him! *wink*

The Downside to Blogging (for me)

When you post about all the details of each day and major life happenings, you lose the daily/weekly contact with your friends and family. My husband doesn't even need to ask me how my day was. Why bother calling or emailing when you can catch up on my life in sixty seconds!? :) I get it. It's still fun for me though, so I blog on.

Here's something to make you laugh on Hump Day!

This and That

Yesterday was interesting. Cinco De Mayo!

Lilly started crawling. Actually, she can get up on her knees and move forward once, maybe twice. She's doing it though! I was/am SO proud. Plus I realized that I have been here for her every "first" including this big one. I can't say that for the other two babes b/c I was working full time or part time with them. This time though, I get to see it all...good and bad. It feels good inside.

Zachary is still doing well with the training. He goes pee every day at least twice a day, if not more. The other end though...not so good. I cleaned up poo TWICE yesterday. Once he was running around in undies and I caught him in the commando crouch. I tried to stop him but it was already in play and he completely freaked out on me if I got within a few feet of him. I eventually had to pull him out of the corner kicking and screaming. I wasn't mad either. I know this will take time and that other part usually takes a little longer than the first. So we cleaned him up and sent him on his way. Then I laid him down for a nap. I warned him to leave the diaper on (he's been taking it off since he thinks he's allowed now) "or else." I heard him whining up there and after so many trips before, I just let him whine. Then a few minutes later I heard him cry and scream for me. "MO-MMY!!!!!!!! I POOP IN DA BED!!!!!!!!!!!" *groan, throw my hands in the air and growl* I hurried up to his room only to see him standing in his bed pointing at what had happened. Ugh! Gross! What do I do first? Grab the kid? Grab the turd? Wrap them all up in the blankets and run 'em to the tub? Nope. I ran downstairs for the camera! Scott HAD to see what HIS son did. I sent him a lovely pic of the experience with a caption that read "I need a raise!" Then I took care of the turd and then the kid and then the blankets.

Ever wonder why I don't write more about Abby here? Well, honestly, she's not nearly as exciting as the other two are right now. She gets woken up, whines, goes to school (does FABULOUSLY btw), comes home, whines, plays with her friends, whines, begrudgingly brushes her teeth, whines and goes to bed. And then we do it all again the next day. It's really boring. She's the easiest one right now, actually. She gets pushed aside a lot too due to the other two demanding so much attention. Bless her heart.


Oh, did I mention Scott moved his test up to Thursday? It's gonna feel so great for him to have it out of the way. We're all a twitter over here waiting for Thursday. Abby even asked, "Dad, when are you gonna be done studying!?" Hopefully FOREVER on Thursday, Sweetie!

So that covers everyone else. How am I doing? I feel like I'm losing my mind every other hour. I swing from perfectly content to miserably exhausted to Mrs. Clean to Mrs. I'll Get it Tomorrow so many times in the day. What is it with us women that we have all these emotions and hormones that get caught up and intertwined with all the excessive crap we do all day. I'll be standing here thinking "I cannot DO one more thing or I'll explode!" and then get a note in Abby's book bag that they need volunteers at school. My mind will just race thinking "how can I squeeze that in? Can someone help me with the kids so I can do that?" Or this weekend is Mother's Day. I am driving myself nutty running scheduling scenarios on how I can squeeze everyone in, plus somehow do all my other regular things like wipes pee off the toilet seats, run the vacuum and feed the children. Why is it that when I think about going to get a pedicure or taking my mom out to lunch this weekend, I feel totally guilty? Like I shouldn't be leaving the kids or Scott behind. Like I am taking something away from them in order to get something for myself. One minute I'm telling myself I just need to slow down and write down what I absolutely must do in a day and only do that. The next I'm running around here like a nut trying to sweep the floor that I've already swept twice earlier instead of just sitting to play with the kids. Even now, I'm posting this message and thinking at the same time, "you should be outside cleaning that carpet cleaner you told your mom you'd sell for her on Craigslist. The kids are sleeping, it's the perfect time." I don't remember feeling this overwhelmed when I worked. I knew what I had to get done, when it needed done and I did it. Lunch was at a certain time, Quitting time at the same time. I had reviews that told me where I was doing well and where I was lacking. I don't have much structure at all here. Okay, note to self: do not ask yourself how you are doing. You ramble. :)

I'm off to cut the grass. It always makes me feel good to mow the grass - like I've really accomplished a big job in a little time. Zach's not sleeping anyway and he's standing here asking for everything under the sun. "I watch Kipper, Mom? I go outside, Mom? I have chips, Mom?" Here we go!!

Have a great Tuesday!!


Edited to Add:

As I was mowing and after I read the daily devotional, I asked myself..."Christy, why is it really that you DO all the things you do? Why do you make yourself nuts running this way and that doing for everyone else?" Then I answered myself very quickly, which usually tells me it not really me at all, but rather the Holy Spirit..."because what you do matters to those you love the most." Well, isn't THAT the truth, and so simple. If I can just remember to tell myself that when I start getting in a snit about ALL the things I do around here and no one helps me (not true really, my hubby is a great dishwasher, tension breaker, putting to bed of the kids guy and he never complains anymore when he has no clean underwear (just leaves the drawer open so I notice.) Abby also does her best to help when Lilly starts crying, even though I tell her she just makes things worse by being so loud *putting the bag over my head*.) I do all these things I do because it makes my life and everyone around me easier/happier/more content/fulfilled/etc. I do these things b/c I can and b/c God gave me the perfect qualities to do so. Thanks, Lord, for the attitude adjustment. :)

Incidentally, one of my very best friends sent me this media file and I found it also on Youtube.

What a nice day!

Today we went to Scott's Aunt and Uncle's place to have a family gathering. His other Uncle and Aunt flew in from Florida (and boy are their arms tired! *ba-dum-bum* Sorry, couldn't help myself!) to visit with the family. It's always SO nice to see everyone. It was also nice to be outside again, smell a fire burning and I got to go out through the aunt/uncles woods on their four wheeler. Then a few of us got out and walked through the woods where the trailer couldn't get to, and it was heavenly. Honestly, I felt so at peace out there I just wanted to stop and sit. I noticed how quiet it was, all the saplings popping up through the dead leaves, the green shoots of new grass bursting forth. You notice these things when you don't have three children clamoring all over you. I actually felt a tear or two well up as I was walking b/c I just realized how quiet it was. It's something I'm really missing in my life...quiet. I think it's a necessary thing to have. How can anyone really get a hold of a thought without there being some quiet? It seems like when I'm home or with my kids, I'm constantly going, constantly thinking of what the next step is, the next ten things that need done in the few hours ahead. The noise is always going, even when the children are asleep it's the T.V. or the washer/dryer. It's so rare in my life now to have peace and quiet... and just for that fleeting moment today as I walked among the trees...my body remembered how it NEEDS some more of that on a regular basis. I told myself as I drove away from there that I would do more to get away, to walk in the woods near my house, to get away from the noise of the children and the daily grind...and just enjoy the beauty of being quiet and in the presence of God.

What a treat today! What a true blessing, a kiss from God.

Saturday

It's all rain here today. BLAH! I'm also fighting a cold on top of gloomy feelings due to the grey conditions. The silver lining is that I got to go get my hair washed, trimmed and flat-ironed this morning. Ahhhhh! That's the best feeling too. I just feel like a new woman. I had my hair trimmed six weeks ago exactly and I can honestly say I've done my hair myself TWICE since then. The rest of the time it's been up in a ponytail holder or under a cap. I'm officially one of those frumpy moms on TLC who go for a makeover and they shame her by unveiling the pale face, the dingy hair and the closet full of mom pants. Well....I have NO mom pants, that's for sure, but I do own a few sweaters that could get me in trouble with the fashion police (i.e. sequins and bows.) Hee hee.

The Baker house is officially on "test watch." Scott's ninth and final exam is on the 12th of May and so every spare moment will be filled with green flash cards, practice tests and comments like "Dang, I'm so nervous" and "If I fail this test it'll be SIX MONTHS until I can do it again. I don't want to fail." And then even when the test is finished it'll be at least two weeks until we hear back from the Architectural Review Board on the results. That's actually fun - the anticipation of the mail and such. Every day Scott calls about Noon and asks, "Did we get mail!?" It's fun. Well...for me anyway. :) Bless his heart. He's so smart and a great test taker - I'm confident in him...and super proud.

Max is seeing a rebound of health. The antibiotics are obviously helping. Each day gets a little better and today he's almost normal. He's out from under the couch and wandering around waiting for food to drop from the kids' plates. He asked to go out this morning and he's even eating right now. No word from the vet yet, and I assume it'll be Monday at the earliest now. My gut feeling is that he's fine as far as Cancer goes, but my gut isn't a professional. We shall see! I'm just glad to see him breathing better and eating on his own. He gave me quite a scare that one night.

Other good news: Zachary is averaging one potty success a day. When we're home I'm keeping him nekked or in underwear. If he's in a diaper - it's a no brainer - he just goes in his diaper. At least when he's nekked he realizes something is happening. We're in no huge rush and I'm very thankful for the progress we've had with his so far. :) Lilly is actually going to sleep on her own now. If she's clearly tired we can now put her in her crib and within a minute or two she's asleep. Woohoo!! Another success!!

That's all for today. I'm off to get something dusted, folded or fed.

The Factory is Closed!

After giving birth to Lilly I KNEW I was finished being pregnant and that she would be my last baby to raise. I had no guilt or question at all - it just was time and I knew it. I told myself that same thing after Zach was born, but didn't take any permanent precautions. Voila - Lilly! :) I'm glad she's here, but even more glad that she's my last. Pregnancy is SOOO hard on our bodies and even harder on our emotions. I was a complete hag during the last two especially and FAAAT. Oh my word did I get fat! No more of that, thank you.

So after talking with the ob/gyn and Scott, I decided that I wanted to go ahead and get the Essure procedure done as a permanent birth control. It was really easy actually! It took about 45 minutes. I had to go under anesthesia but came out easily and was awake/ready to go home quickly. I had no real down time either. It took me a few hours to wake up from being groggy and a nap helped, but I went to Abby's Christmas program that same night.

Today I had an appointment to have a dye test done in order to be sure the tubes are completely scarred shut. I felt like I was at a regular gyn appt except that it was clearly in a surgical/radiology setting. They most concerning part was that all three people in the room (doc, radiologist and nurse) geared up in lead aprons AND scarves . Ummm...hello? Do I get any lead or is it just dangerous for you guys? *nervously laughing* It was very cool actually to look up at the screen and see my innards functioning around my bones. The doc and radiologist thought they saw a fibroid tumor, but we quickly excused it as the septum of my irregularly shaped uterus. My first gyn explained to me that I have a severely heart shaped uterus and that it would most likely cause me great difficulty in getting pregnant. HA! One. Two. Three. Nope, no difficulty here! SOOOOO - anyway. The test confirmed that I am indeed unable to get pregnant in the normal fashion. WOOOHOO!! *doing the happy dance* I can now rest easy and no longer worry about birth control. Pretty cool, eh!? That part of my life is now over. I can square up my shoulders and face the future of enjoying my three babies as much as possible. What is that? Is that a light? Yea, I can see it...down there...at the end of the child-rearing tunnel. RUN! Hee hee hee. Nah, I'll try to stay in the moment and enjoy these kids as little ones. When I told the doc today that Scott and I joke about bringing Lilly back to him, he quickly said he'd easily swap me Lilly for his two teenage daughters. He even wrote down Dr. Ray's website, name and title of the book. Tee hee. I guess it doesn't get easier as they get older then. Oye!


Max is doing better, I think. He's not gasping for air anymore and he feels less hot to the touch. My job is to keep his meds going and get him to eat anything at all. Michae even said to give him a hamburger if he'd eat it. I haven't seen him eat or drink anything except what we gave him last night to get his pills down, plus half a hot dog, two slices of turkey meat and some pieces of chicken. Hopefully we'll hear from the vet this afternoon. If it's just pneumonia then we will have to keep him on antibiotics for several months until we're sure he's all better.

By the way, whoever said "sleep begets sleep" was 110% correct. Zach took a two hour naps, went to sleep finally about 10:00ish and slept ALL night, no screaming. Lilly slept all night as well, and then within two hours of being awake this morning is taking a nap and it's been an hour already. Woohoo! Too bad Mommy can't sleep at the same time. :)


More later! Have a great day, all!

Max and the kids

I am SOOO tired and yet here I stand at the counter, posting. One, because Max's breathing is so horrid sounding that I couldn't get to sleep and had to bring his basket downstairs. And now that I'm down here watching him I feel just terrible for him and don't want to leave him. He's gasping for air at this point and then when he breathes out it's just a death rattle. He tried to get comfortable and lay his head down, but he obviously cannot breath without opening his mouth, so laying his head down is not an option. I almost wonder if he's gonna make it through the night. I spoke with my vet tech neighbor who worked with Max today. She saw the films and said that it doesn't look good. The vet is seriously leaning toward Lymphoma and showed her comparative x-rays to try and make her understand. Michae is forever optimistic though and is praying that this is just a horrible case of pneumonia - the worst she's ever seen. I hope that Max is able to get some rest tonight, but I just don't see how it's gonna happen. I can hear him in there gasping for every breath.

The other reason I'm still awake is b/c Lilly is upstairs crying. I just don't understand that child! She's been awake nearly ALL day, hasn't had more than half an hours nap and I even gave her a dose of Tylenol to help her feel better (she has a cold - green snot and all). She still won't sleep! I'm exhausted and definitely coming down with something myself. My throat is sore and my neck aches. Poor Scott too - his allergies are so flared up right now. I did get him some OTC Zyrtec (thanks, mom!) and he'll start taking that tomorrow. I hope it helps. You know - it's SO much worse over here than it is where he works (right in the middle of a wooded area.) I'm guessing it's one of these flowering trees that is bothering him so much, but who knows which one. I feel bad for him though. If it's not his nose running, it's stuffed to the top. If it's not those, it's his eyes burning/itching. Yowsers!

Well, I think Lilly may have passed out again up there, so I'd better take this opp to go get some sleep. Of course my heart is breaking for Max though. God bless his little pneumatic heart.

Michae said she'd call me as soon as she gets any word from the specialist. Keep your fingers crossed for him.

Max (update #1 at bottom)

As I was getting things around this morning, trying to get out the door in time for school I heard Max making a funny sound from the other room. I peeked in the front room and watched him for a minute and could tell he was having a hard time breathing. He'd kinda snort while pulling air in and then let out a shallow breath real hard. I went over to him and talked to him, but he didn't even lift his head. Now keep in mind, Max has been a strange dog from the word go. He's had a really hard life too. He's a toy poodle and about nine years old (we're guessing based on the guess the former owners gave us.) My friend and I found him wandering the streets of our neighborhood, dirty as a little scoundrel and COVERED in fleas/ear mites. Long story shortened: we paid the owners $100 to keep him and they gave him up. He's been a really quiet dog too, for the most part. Anyway, back to the point of the post. He's at the vet's office now being given a high dose of antibiotics due to what they think is pneumonia. His chest x-ray came back inconclusive though. She said they can see 1) his lymph nodes are very inflamed 2) he looks to have a really bad case of pneumonia and 3) they want to send the x-rays to a person who looks at radiographs as their primary job to confirm whether or not Max has Cancer. Our vet tech confirmed that she thinks at the very least he has a very bad case of pneumonia, but that there is something more there and they cannot be 100% what it is without a professional opinion. So - they are sending them out today I assume and she said they should be back within 24 hours. TODAY they have given him the high potency antibiotic and are keeping him under observation until 4pm, then I pick him up and will give him two different antibiotics to try and knock this out. And then we wait to see what the other guy says. And of course there's always the financial end of things, which for the day she said should be about $300. Yikes. Hopefully it's just the pneumonia and these treatments will make him better. The alternative is not something we want to really go into. We always tease that Max is going to meet an untimely death (he DID survive getting hit by a car/lost in a strange city/crossing a major highway/being thrown down the stairs and not to mention a big number of his teeth being pulled) but we certainly don't want to be the ones responsible for saying "well, it's too much $ to treat your Cancer, so sorry Max." Plus, my Mom will be crushed if we had to come to that decision. She has such a soft heart for Max and he just ADORES her. So...puh-lease...let it just be pneumonia. I'd rather hope that Max just dies of old age in his bed basket.

I'll update as the news comes in!

He's home, but not all feeling well. They gave him some fluids intravenously and it collected under the skin on one side, so he has this fluid, jelly like blob on his side. The tech said it would be absorbed eventually. It's really gross to feel though. He has two medications to take twice a day, which we started tonight. Tomorrow afternoon the vet should have heard back from the specialist, so until then we wait. I just went under the couch to visit Max and he's just laying there staring off. I feel so bad for him.

Abby was very concerned for Max too. She immediately went to the worst case scenario and asked what we'd do with his body if he died. I just simply told her that the vet would bury him for us and left it at that. I am suppose to watch his breathing and make sure he eats/drinks something, but that's really hard to do with three kids and Max being under the couch. I'll just have to make a point to do it though. Poor Max. :(

Still Reeling From Last Night

It was a ROUGH night in the Baker house. I think we received our confirmation that Zachary definitely still needs a nap, even if it causes him to stay up later. He ran ALL DAY yesterday. We had the neighbor boys in and out throughout the day, and then went to the Y in the evening. I think between taking the bottle away, starting to potty train and not taking a nap - all this at once - he's on information/emotional overload.

He went to bed about 8:30 last night and then proceeded to cry in his sleep for the rest of the night. Lilly didn't go to sleep until about 9:30 and by then I was numb. You probably saw the previous post. I was just exhausted from it all and then looking around at the house was seriously bringing me down. It's NO wonder why women are frazzled and dealing with depression. It's like fighting the same uphill battle every single day. So anyway, both kids were down for maybe half an hour and Zach started crying. He was just crying in his sleep, so we left him alone. But then Lilly woke up. I tried to let her cry a little, so I could enjoy my cookies and beer in peace (no, they don't compliment each other. They did both taste good though.) I finally went up to get her, completely frustrated, fed her again and sent her back to sleepy land. Scott and I gave up for the day at about 11pm.

12:40 came. Just long enough to be in a deep sleep and interuption felt like someone dumped a pile of rocks onto our heads. I couldn't even tell you who got up first, but I can tell you it took a good half an hour of talking to a half-asleep boy who refused to stop screaming. I think he was having a night terror b/c he just sat there, eyes half open screaming. He could respond to us, but wouldn't stop crying. We tried patting his back/toosh, giving him some water, rocking him, talking sweetly, talking sternly, threatening...nothing worked. I finally got fed up with him screaming and possibly waking up Lilly that I scooped him out of bed and flew him downstairs to sit on the couch. Scott and I sat there FUMING MAD not knowing WHAT to do. We were so exhausted, Scott's head and eyes ached, I was over the top tired and neither of us had a clue of what to do. We all just ended up laying down on the couches/floor. Although, not before I had a few choice words to fling around the kitchen and the thoughts of grabbing my keys and driving far away screamed in my head! I eventually left the two of them to sleep downstairs and went back to bed. I figured I had to get up and deal with the kids all day today and I'd definitely paid my dues in sleepless nights. Well, Scott came back to bed after Zach fell off the couch and woke them both up. Thankfully he went into bed without too much of a fight. But then of course Lilly had to wake up. *deep sigh* *shuffling feet across the carpet* Seriously? So I went downstairs and nursed her back to sleep.

At this point it's about 3am. Back to sleep, hopefully for the rest of the morning. Nope!

5:20 - Zachary starts his loud crying again and this time he's talking out his dream. All I can make out is "No, Mommy. No." and he's rolling around in his bed. Greeeat - the nightmare is about me! I just stood there to make sure he wasn't going to get any worse and within minutes he was quiet again. *shuffling feet back to bed*

7:00 - It's Zach AGAIN. This time he's crying about the airplane flying over the house. Sometimes it sounds like they are going to land on the house, but no matter, the noise of them flying over (high or low) makes him nervous and he screams for one of us. Frick! So I just get him out of bed and downstairs so he doesn't wake anyone else up. Of course - Abby sleeps through it all! I think she's hit the teenage sleepiness early. It's like waking the dead getting her out of bed.

So - I'm still angry. Thankfully Scott came bouncing down the stairs all daisy fresh from his shower (though all puffy from allergies and sleeplessness), scooped Zachary up and said "you're lucky I love you" and kissed him all over. It helped to see his better attitude b/c I was standing in the kitchen like a miser, thinking about how the rest of the day I have to manage the kids on barely any sleep.


I know I can do this today. I will not hold it against my child that he had a night terror...he just has to have a nap in the day. He's only three years old, basically still a baby trying to be a big boy. God love him...he IS cute. He's sitting on the potty right now trying to go again. He did go pee a little and now he's trying to do the other one. *wink*

In other news: Scott's office is moving today. KDG bought a new office space and are actually moving closer to our house, which is cool. I'm excited for them. I loved the other office - it was more like a loft space, open to everyone, but not enough room for them. I'll take pictures of the new space when they get moved in and post them here. It's amazing how quickly they've grown.

I'd better get a move on. I think it's important for me to get the Y today and blow off some steam and Abby is not up yet. Gotta hurry!